On My Own ... Part 2

Well, here I am with my thoughts, my computer and a little time on my hands. Yes, I am by myself for the second time in as many years and have finally decided it's time to update the blog. 

It's been a while. 

It is not missed on me that the VERY time that I decided to collect my thoughts and open up the blog again is at my parents' beach condo as a party of one. This time is slightly different than when I posted in 2015; I have left TWO sweet children under the care of family. 

We have some updates! 

It has been two years since I last posted. Two years since I sat (lounged?) on this very couch in Stone Harbor NJ, listening to the ocean and watching the sunset on a mini retreat. Jacob is with Andy in Arkansas for a father/son week of bonding and Hannah-girl is with Me'Me' and Papa John enjoying grandparent cuddles and some incredible success at sleep training. 

I am collecting my thoughts. I'm not sure why I stopped writing.. well, not entirely true. I do know why I stopped writing on this blog. Fear of saying the wrong things, writing something inappropriate, saying something very obtuse and not catching it until it's too late, making typos, my students finding my inner thoughts and family business on the web, and even the ridiculous thought that something I write could go "viral" and cause all kinds of avoidable pain and drama. I am not witty. Trying to create mini stories of our daily going ons with cute names is stressful - and absolutely doesn't have to be as I am not out to win any blogging awards. I do not take good pictures. And everyone knows all blogs must have amazingly lit, clutter free pics to accompany every well-crafted event description, right? I have LOTS of reasons why I stopped blogging. 

Why deal with this avoidable stress of putting out posts on a blog? In this quiet moment, I was able to reflect on literally hundreds of thoughts and moments that I've wanted to write about over the past two years, but didn't because of fear. And the lack of time.... but mostly, fear. I have come back to the place of why I started this blog in the FIRST place - as a space to encapsulate a narrative of the daily events of our family. For my family, my tribe, my dear ones who are scattered throughout this world that I would love to be a part of our journey. That is why I started this blog.

And I got off course. 

I am so thankful for the moments of clarity that we are given. I'm thankful for the time to take a prayer reflection of where I have been (let me see.. pregnant. no, nursing, no pregnant, no, nursing) and to help navigate where I am going. And so, while I have no idea who will read this post tonight, tomorrow or next week, it is my sincere hope that my children read this sometime in the future and learn a little bit about their childhood, and maybe even their parents, that they did not know.

And so, thank you for reading. Thank you for joining me as I chronicle some of the highs and maybe a couple lows of this journey, Bringing up Bowers.  

Jacob and Hannah, this is for you. 

Enjoyed some fantastic sunsets... Sure didn't catch any sunrises :-) 

Daily bikerides to yoga were a must.

It was high 80s all week ... People, where ya at? 

Selfies ... because there was no one to take a pic with me or for me!
This is one well rested mama ready to see her family.